Full thanks

Motherhood is a thankless job. We are told that. I played victim to it this morning, cleaning spilled (rice) milk, a squished banana segment and crumbs of shredded wheat. The milk, still seeping through the crack in the table leaf, the thought comes: who is thankless?

If I find myself complaining about cleaning after these pudgy, clumsy fingers, I cannot be thankful for them at the same time. If I find myself feeling pity-ful then can I at the same moment be filled with gratitude for this gift of the day, the life, the Light?

Obviously not, I have to learn to choose the thanksgiving for myself. The thanks for the sunny person, attached to fingers that find cups so slippery. The thanksgiving that I am healthy enough to be the one cleaning up and that the little fingers are healing and healthy enough to be making the messes in the fist place.

They do help with a fair share around here and are always grateful when I save legos from the roaring vacuum. I used to say, "their smiles are thanks enough." Of course they are! Now my thoughts lean my heart to say - my smile of gratefulness is what is enough.

Last weeks list...
106. Rain drops pitter, patter 107. Day dreaming eyes out the window 108. Watching raindrops hit puddles on pavement 109. Patterns of circles, polka dots, created by rain drop waves 110. Listening and boy dancing to the rhythmic pounding, drip, drip drop. 111. Little boy voice sing, song, "sneaky e makes a say it's name. Sneaky e is famous!" 112. duck, duck and goose 113. Running in circles, until dizziness overcomes 114. Dizzying haze tickle fight 115. Filling up our 'heart tanks' with hugs and snuggles 116. Oven baking, extra heat escaping, warming. 117. Whole wheat, ground goodness 118. Freezers, to hold my brown bananas until I'm ready 119. Banana muffins, crumbly and sweet 120. Fingers through soft, short hair at bedtime 121. Dishwasher thumping methodically downstairs 121. Band-aids to cover the evidence of hurt 122. Giggles, while peeling off the band-aid strips 123. Taking time to watch the ducks 124. Independent boy, making himself breakfast 125. Jello, sweet, peachy, goes down easy 126. The boys, healthy, dressed, holding down the fort 127. The girls, pale, snuggling under blankets 128. Bathrobes 129. Applesauce, fruit from last years harvest 130. Robins chirping 131. Tulips faithfully pushing the hard earth away 132. Little girls big, purposeful skips 133. Feeling better 134. Warming wet, towel covered arms with firm, quick strokes 135. Brave little girl, watching stitches get snipped 136. One tiny lip quavering for only a moment 137. A smile and talking to the nurse about favorite princesses 138. A tea party to celebrate no more stitches 139. Camel's 'hump' park 140. walks with friends 141. climbing trees 142. first scraped knees and scratches telling spring is arriving 143. SPRING! 144.kids playing game after game of sequence on a Saturday afternoon 145. huckleberry pancakes 146. kids sharing memories of foraging for huckleberries last summer 147. Husband, who just knows how